Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
