i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
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Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
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It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?