no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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