Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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