I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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