It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize