I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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