and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
You are a genius and a whore.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
