Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
