Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
