i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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