My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
