did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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