dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
