I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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