i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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