He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
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It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
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We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.