I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
