a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
sex in a hospital.. check
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
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