girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize