white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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