i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
