you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
