he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
