My brain says no but my pants say off.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
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