you're like a bully in the Christmas story
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
he just fucked me for my cheese.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
