You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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