I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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