she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize