bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
