I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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