She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
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