i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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