Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
