tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
this is an emotional support booty call
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize