So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Randomize
