After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
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uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
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Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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