I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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