guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
