I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
