Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize