i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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