I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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