so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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