remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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