meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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