No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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