She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
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i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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