I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
