whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
