I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
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