it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
